This game is too hard. Maybe if you’re like really good at games or something, then you might like this game. Me, I don’t like it all that much because, like I said, it’s just too damn hard.
Things shooting at you, holes to fall into, crazy android supervillains with turbocharged weapons…this is a lot more stress than, say, a gardening game, or some sort of card game. Nintendo Canasta, that’s the way to go, or Nintendo Euchre, that’s the ticket.
Honestly, with all the loud noises and all the flashing, I don’t see how anyone is supposed to get into this game. The Japanese are crazy. And it’s totally unrealistic. Maybe this is what it’s like to live in Tokyo, but it’s certainly nothing like D’Starkville. Paperboy, now THAT game is a pretty true-to-life description of this place.
To tell you the truth, I never wanted to be a video game reviewer. I wanted to go overseas, to be a foreign correspondent doing stories about corrupt dictators and international corporate espionage. Instead, they’ve got me locked in a room with a kid’s toy reviewing whatever steaming pile of digital poo is making the rounds this week.
I hate my life.
